a zissis in london: September 2010

One of the great parts about having people visit is you get to become a bit of a tourist in your home city. This comes in handy if there's still a bunch of your city that you haven't yet seen. Like Greenwich.

Quick history lesson. Greenwich is best known for three things: The Cutty Sark, Greenwich Mean Time, and the palace, which is the birthplace of many Tudor sovereigns including Elizabeth I. Unfortunately for us, the Cutty Sark is undergoing massive refurbishment (apparently due to a fire in 2007, which happened during "conservation". Way to go.), the ultimate aim being that tourists can walk right under the thousand tonne 19th century merchant vessel. Bags not first.

But first you have to get to Greenwich, and we did so by walking under the Thames river. Here's that:

We took a guided tour around the palace area and up to the Royal Observatory. The palace, like so many palaces, was fairly lovely, and I got a teensy bit obsessed with pillars.

I got more obsessed with this staircase outside Queen Anne's House (here pictured, built from what I can gather was for her own amusement. Y'know, dinner parties and stuff), and because you are my captive audience (emphasis on "captive"), here it is:

Other (non pillar- or stair-related) snaps from around Greenwich:

Here was where three bridges were built to ferry people down to the river. Why three? One for the Queen, one for the King, and one for the common folk that the Royals shouldn't have to share a walkway with:

There in the distance is the Royal Observatory, on which you can see the big red ball has descended - it rises and abruptly drops at 1pm each day. The observatory sits at the top of a hill that felt a lot higher than it looks, and it's bloody lucky we made it up there at all.

The Zissises in various time zones:

And since there was no photography inside the observatory, and I was pretty tired by the time I got there anyway, this is all the observatory shots you're getting.

So recently I had a visit from a couple of world travellers to my weeny London flat that increased the number of Zissises in London by 300%: the parentals were coming, and a whirlwind cleaning blitz was in order - I even borrowed a neighbour's vacuum and cleaned the fridge (but not the freezer...got to save something for when the Queen visits). Early on a Friday morning I met them out at Paddington Station (by the bear, no longer on a pedestal, as I remember it, but in the middle of a food court) and introduced them to the joys of tube changes and line closures. Eventually, however, we did make it to Muswell Hill and set about planning the week.

After a visit to Madame Tussaud's the first day (in an effort to keep mum and dad's jet lag at bay) we had a good night's sleep and set off the next morning for Windsor Castle, home of the Royal Family.

Here are Mum (Marion) and Dad (Bill) under the Round Tower of Windsor Castle.

The Lady of the House was unfortunately not in residence (holidaying in Scotland) but we nosied around her home anyway. Those familiar with stories of my travels will be surprised by my decision to get a hand-held audio guide (having such bad luck previously - setting off alarms in sacred places, dropping said guide into certain Roman Baths...) but it appears the curse is over! The good people at Windsor got their guide back in working order! Wonders will never cease...

Anyway. Various views of the castle:

Just here you can see that the "Round Tower" isn't exactly round. This is due to trying to keep the tower from falling down into the moat. Possibly also to give the guides something to say.

Here is the moat - never supposed to be a water moat. Apparently the beautiful gardens are enough to stop the invaders - a counter attack can be made from the tower while they admire the roses. Muahaha.

Here are the guards at practice. The machine guns are intimidating. The marching and the fuzzy hats are not.

The guy in front's hat is askew. Hee.

Fuzzy hats from the rear!

Surprised to learn that there was a fire at the castle in 1992, destroying about 40 million pounds worth of furniture and paintings. The fire was started by a couple of workmen, when a spotlight they were using ignited a curtain (Em. Barrassing.) and it turned out they don't build 'em like they used to for a reason. Restorations were done quite quickly for a total of 36.5 million pounds (bargainous!) and to assist in covering the costs Buckingham Palace was opened to the public for the first time ever (talk about your silver linings). Interesting stories came out of the fire of people, including Prince Andrew apparently launching into some rooms with a knife, cutting the paintings out of their frames in an attempt to rescue some of the world's most priceless artwork. (Also the Queen's Surveyor of Pictures is called Christopher Lloyd. Great Scott! This is him:

No. Not really.)

Moving on. You've never seen so much gold, I'm telling you. It's amazing. There are walls and walls of paintings by everyone from Holbein to Da Vinci, a ceiling decorated with the coats of arms of each and every member of the Order of the Garter, Henry the 8th's suit of armour (here the audio guide suggested we go around to take a sideways view - a bit harsh, but you can't deny that he was a bit anorexically challenged) and a statue made of Queen Elizabeth II to mark the opening of Parliament House, Canberra (WOO! CANBERRA!).

I must say, I said a little prayer for the cleaning staff for attempts to keep the dust off each and every decorative vase, cabinet, piano and mirror. They deserve some kind of medal. (I'm not kidding. Do you know how much dust my weeny flat accumulates? I don't even have any pianos!)

Afterwards, for those who just weren't impressed with the big stuff, there's Queen Mary's Doll's House. I know what you're thinking - how impressive can a doll's house be? I'll tell you. It's a castle whose rooms you can see inside. And it all works. The cars run on tiny petrol engines, fuelled from tiny petrol pumps. There is real, drinkable wine in the tiny bottles in the cellar, in which are also stored tiny real potted preserves. The lights work. The plumbing works. The tiny electric VACUUM works. There are chamber pots under the beds. There are tiny real gold forks and knives laid out on the dining table and real, miniature portraits, painted by the original artists, hanging on the walls. The tiny books have real writing in them. It. Is. AWESOME.

Unfortunately it's also stored in a dark room and under glass for its own protection, so there are no photos to share here.

Here's mum telling me that you're not allowed to take photos inside. Just past her is the grand staircase, which we are told Queen Victoria always met her guests at the top of, because she didn't think it was right, after her husband Albert died, to walk up stairs in the presence of other men. I'm not altogether clear on her reasoning, unless it was so that no one had the opportunity of glimpsing the Royal Behind. Mum suspects it's more about being on the arm of another man. Potato, potahto.

After that it was all about contending with photographers - tourists - who didn't seem to graspthe fact that other people were also trying to get photos, and thought nothing of running repeatedly in front of the palace guards just as you pressed the button. Sigh.